EAST COAST WANDER

**Everyone is an early riser in North Queensland**

Our last venture before leaving the Cassowary Coast and wandering back down south was a day exploring Tully and the Tully Gorge. Tully is a centre for sugar refining and when I commented at the Visitors Centre on the smoke billowing from the local refinery, I was told it is 90% steam and 10% smoke (hmmm maybe!). The Gorge is also renowned for white water rafting. We did see a number of rapids through the Gorge but the crazy people in the rafts had already been through on the day we visited.

We had a lazy week in Townsville visiting the Clubs, walking along and exploring the Strand and swimming our laps at the Tobruk Memorial Baths or the Kokoda pool. Our accommodation was in a very up market Air bnb tastefully decorated by the French hostess who was also the Veterinary Professor at the local Uni.

We had a few nights at Mackay to break the 1000km trip to Agnes Waters. When we asked the young Receptionist at our Hotel about local attractions she replied the she “hated” Mackay and couldn’t wait to leave. I must admit it isn’t my favourite place either. We then continued down the track to our first visit to Agnes Waters and the neighbouring town of Seventeen Seventy. The town is built on the site of the second landing in Australia by Capt Cook and the crew of the Endeavour. We visited the museum, Bustard lookout and other points of interest. A week was probably a bit long as the last few evenings were spent sitting in bars with lots of other tourists trying to capture the ultimate sunset photo.

Hervey Bay was our next stop and we had an apartment in a great spot on the Torquay esplanade. Previous visits had only been a couple of days with accommodation near the Marina and Boat Club. The Torquay area had a much better vibe with great beaches, boardwalks and a pub with Guinness on tap! Lots of Tourist things to do and probably one of the best RSL clubs we have visited (yes another membership card)

The Queensland leg of our holiday ended in Brisbane. I was delighted to receive a ticket to the Port/Brisbane game, as a Father’s day gift from our son. Louise our eldest daughter joined me for the game the rest is history. Despite the football result it was great to catch up with friends and family at a at Louise’s place on the Gold Coast next day.

We have now been away for 3 months and the plan is to travel down the coast with 3 nights in Emerald Beach (near Coffs Harbour), 3 nights in Port Macquarrie and another 3 in the Hunter Valley. We have extended the itinerary by another couple of days as I discovered a race meeting in Hawkesbury before we head home through Mildura.

While lunching at a trendy little bar near Mission Beach, we noticed the father of the family at the table next to us becoming very annoyed at his mobile ringing and then the caller hanging up. This went on for some time and then the mother started receiving similar calls, again from an unknown number. My eagle eyed wife was quick to spot that at least one of children was absent each time the parents received a call. She suggested they were taking it in turns to sneak off to the public phone box just outside the bar to prank the parents. I had no idea calls to mobile numbers were now free. I thought the free calls were only to emergency numbers. Well it turns out I had the opportunity to test the system by ringing my dear wife from a phone box one day while she was shopping and I was bored. Great fun but she caught on after the first two calls so yes it is free and it prompted my new limerick.

So good old Telstra made it free to call from any phone box

Yet people remain booth averse for fear of catching mouth pox

And when I went for my free call

There in the booth was someone tall

Then Superman burst out the door while pulling up his bright red jocks!
MT 2023

Cairns and The Cassowary Coast

We stayed 4 weeks in Cairns including a surprisingly pleasant day at the Cairns Show. Evidently it is the largest regional show in Australia and it certainly had plenty on offer including the norms (wood chopping, equestrian etc) and the bizarre (pig races, duck races and even baby races!). It also featured one of those gravity defying rides that tip people upside down at a great height – this one made National News as it became stuck and left the thrill seekers dangling for a couple of hours. Great fun!

Despite our many visits to Cairns we always seem to find plenty to do along the waterfront and around the Lagoon. We also had a surprise visit from some good friends from Largs and enjoyed taking them around to a few of our favourite haunts.

We moved about an hour down the Coast to Innisfail and it hardly stopped raining during our 4 day stay (annual rainfall 140 inches and already above average this year). The town has a very strong Art Deco influence with most of the buildings in the town area reflecting the style. I’m not a big fan but I must admit some of the buildings were very impressive considering they have been hit with a couple of Cyclones over the years including Larry as recently as 2006. We were all set to attend the Banana Industry Race day on the Saturday of our stay but not surprisingly it was postponed until September because of the rain. The promo material suggested it would have been a good fun day so we may look at scheduling it in next year.

The other reason for staying at Innisfail was to visit Paronella Park and Mamu Tropical Sky Walk. The History behind the creation of Paronella Park is fascinating including that fact that the Spanish bloke who created it way back in 1930 used the waterfall that flows through the park to generate Hydroelectricity to run the attractions.

The Mamu Tropical Sky Walk, a series of paths and lookouts high above the Rainforest canopy, was impressive. We also had an encounter with a Cassowary that decided to follow us along one of the paths for a couple of hundred metres. I’m not sure what they eat but I managed to step in one of their droppings and it was the size of a cow pat.

Kurrimine Beach located on the Cassowary Coast, was a new experience for us. The beaches along this coast all have the feel of Rainforest meeting the Ocean. Unlike the beaches north of Cairns there are only a few resorts and hardly any high-rise buildings. Spotting Cassowaries in the wild while on one of the National Park rainforest walks, on the beautiful beaches or just driving around is what brings many tourists to the region.

We stayed 2 great weeks exploring the beaches and enjoying local facilities like the excellent Aquatic Centre at Mission Beach where we spent every second morning lap swimming and then lolling about in the hydro pool.

And Rainforest Beaches all along the Cassowary Coast

The Swimming Centres up here can be found in most towns and offer great facilities (solar heated). I really enjoy my lap swimming and seriously feel a regular visit to “Doctor Pool” can soothe many ailments and generally improve the mood.

My limerick this time is dedicated to “Dr Pool”

My GP prescribed Doctor pool
So I swim 20 laps as a  rule
My body feels fresher
My life has no pressure
And I’m passing a regular stool

MT 2023

Heading North for Winter – 2023

Once again we have chosen to avoid winter in Adelaide and head for the Tropics. Mid-June we travelled to Warnertown (near Port Pirie) for a very pleasant catch up with on old friend on his 70^th birthday. We then chose to avoid the usual Broken Hill route and spent our first night at Mildura. After that it was several one night stops on our way north to Brisbane where we were booked on the Spirit of Queensland train to Cairns.

Apart from the minus 3 degree night we spent at Armidale, it was a fairly uneventful trip although we did drop in for lunch at a small country town just off the highway after Tamworth. Bendemeer (Population 485) greeted us with a large sign announcing it was the home town of Josh Hazlewood. He is currently in England ensuring the Australian Cricket Team retains the Ashes. The people at the Café (where we had an excellent lunch) explained Josh is known locally as the Bendemeer Bullet. They also told us the story of how the sign was stolen a couple of years ago during the local Rodeo. The sign re-appeared a few nights later after a local lynch mob had formed. It seems that if you sneak off the highway, every little town has an interesting story.

After about a week relaxing in Brisbane and on the Gold Coast spending time with our daughter and relatives, my sister dropped us at Roma Street Station to catch the Spirit of Queensland train to Cairns. Thanks again to my sisters and their families for hosting us for a few days. My other sister and brother in law had kindly agreed to drive our car from Brisbane and meet us in Cairns as they were keen to do the return train trip. The trip takes about 25 hours and the Rail Bed Service (meals, personal entertainment system, showers etc) was great. In the evening the on board team convert the seat to a lie flat bed with fresh linen and other creature comforts – good trip and highly recommended.

On arrival we spent a week at a resort apartment in Holloway Beach just north of Cairns. The beaches are beautiful and the Cairns Council is developing The Northern Beaches Leisure Trail. It is a slow paced walking trail from Cairns to Palm Cove (about 20kms through half a dozen beautiful beach suburbs with views of the islands). We have completed one section and hope to do more over the next few weeks.

We are now settled into an apartment in Cairns and will be here until the end of July. The nights get down to just under 20 degrees and the days in the mid to high 20’s. It is fantastic to wake up in the morning, read the paper in my shorts and T-shirt on the balcony and then wander down to the local swimming pool to do some laps. The water temp is 27.5 degrees so ideal for us Southerners but evidently the locals still find it too cold at this time of year. Apart from that it has been a matter of enjoying the warmth, catching up with some friends off a Cruise Ship for a Guinness at a local Irish bar, a day at the Cairns races and visiting local clubs like Cazaly’s Football Club for the Sunday Roast. Amazingly they weigh the meat (see photo) to ensure everybody receives a minimum of 250 grams.

I have also been watching the cricket and reading all about the Chaps in the members abusing our wonderful lads over a fair and reasonable dismissal. This prompted my latest limerick that you will find meaningless if you don’t follow cricket.

A Keeper of wickets named Carey
Stumped batsmen who weren’t very wary
He’d throw down the wicket
To cries of “NOT CRICKET”
But Carey was scary and surprisingly hairy!

FNQ TRAVELS & FOND MEMORIES OF MY FATHER

Magnetic Island

Beautiful Magnetic Island is a one-hour ferry ride from Townsville and a favourite destination. We took the car across on the Ferry (at generous Senior’s rates). This 2-week stay on the Island was our 3rd visit and I’m sure we will be back again.

Margret Meets the Stars – Geez I laughed!

The Island offers some terrific bush walks and the tracks are the only way to access some of the beaches. We set off to visit Radical Bay for a swim and after struggling up hills and stone steps for 2 hours, we vowed to find an easier track back to the car. After an 11km torture track, we arrived back on the main road just as a very welcome bus pulled up. The one-dollar fare back to the car at Horseshoe Bay was an absolute bargain. Apart from the great beaches, parks, wildlife and bush walks they also have a brand-new Brewery. We spent a lazy hour or two there sampling the product and enjoying the food – well deserved after the trauma of bushwalking on the previous day.

Cane Toad races have been happening at the Arcadia Hotel every Wednesday night for the last 40 years. The night we attended there were around 100 people bidding the price of the toads up to about $200 on average. It is a fantastic fundraiser for the Island’s Surf Club and I reckon over $1000 would have been raised on the night.

Airlie Beach

After Maggie (local speak along with Hammo – work it out!) we lobbed in Airlie Beach. It’s all about boats in Airlie and it was great to catch up with Wayne and Kaye, our friends from Lincoln. They are caravanning up this way and we have bumped into each other a couple of times in the last month. Check out the last Photo – Oyster Bars (Saloons) over a hundred years ago in Emu Park (is nothing new?)

It was also a pleasant surprise to have our eldest daughter Louise visit Airlie during our stay. We caught up with her and her friend Brad on her birthday! Brad travels all over the place building pools and had a couple of projects in Airlie. It was good to meet him and this pool he just finished in Airlie looks like a real winner to me.

Airlie is all about relaxing around the resort pool in the Sunshine but I got a bit bored and decided to finish off a poem I started last year. It is a great yarn, it is true and it brings a smile to my face every time I reflect upon how it unfolded about 45 years ago. With Father’s Day imminent I decided to share it with you and hope you enjoy the read.

FOND MEMORIES OF MY FATHER

Our lovely Mum had passed away, us kids long fled the nest
Our poor old Dad was all alone and though he did his best,
The yard was huge, the weeds were high, the house in disrepair
But he couldn’t find the mower after looking everywhere 

Monday’s market at the abattoir offered almost anything
Livestock plus all kinds of junk in days when cash was king
So Bernie (that’s was Dad’s name) thought he’d buy a mower there
And set off slowly in the Kingswood as he drove slow everywhere

He kept glancing at the stalls for a mower he could buy 
With his eye out for a bargain as he only had one eye
Bernie’s other eye was glass and as it wandered around its socket
He spied the perfect bargain and his hand flew to his pocket

Ten dollars was the price they asked but he beat them down to five
And he thought himself a genius as this mower was ALIVE
A goat he thought it’s perfect, I won’t need to move my arse
 I’ll just put it on a nice long chain and it can eat the grass

He stuffed it in the backseat and made the slow dash home
Then released it in the backyard on a chain and let it roam
They settled in quite nicely the goat happy on its chain
And Bernie was delighted as he would never mow again

And then one day the phone rang and the Council said they’d found
A goat loose in the streets and parks but now locked in the pound.
He could have his goat back, once he’d paid a fifty-dollar fine
So Bernie on the front foot asked “are you sure that goat is mine?”

The Council bloke went very quiet and then cut back to the chase
We know it’s yours, it's black and brown with white bits on its face
Bernie quickly set him straight and said his goat was black and white
“Nothing brown on my goat so best check your info’s right”

The Council bloke just grunted, mumbling something down the line
Then finished with a wasted threat ‘bout the fifty-dollar fine
Bernie thought he’d best go check the goat peg out the back
And even with just one eye, he could see the chain was slack 

So the Council had his goat but he knew just what he’d do
He’d hold out for a week or two and let the Council stew
And sure enough, the Council rang exactly two weeks later
And the Council bloke took on the voice of a stern and cruel Dictator 

"If this goats not claimed by Monday it’ll be put down by the Vet”
“Are you sure that’s wise?" asked Bernie “it might just be some kid's pet”
The Council bloke was livid clearly reaching his wits end
“Come and pay the fine, and get your goat, 'fore I go round the bend'	

It was then that Bernie grasped his mood and gave this bloke a tickle
“What if I adopt the stray to help resolve this pickle?”
The Council bloke was dumbfounded and hung up in despair
And Bernie stood convinced that his adoption deal was fair

It was only one day on when the Council rang with news
But this time a nice young lady spoke who “undertook reviews”
She politely informed Bernie that she had reviewed the case
And was delighted to assure him, that things were now in place
To accept his generous offer to adopt the homeless goat
Providing he was happy she would send the Pound a note.

Well Bernie knew he’d won the day but asked if fees applied
No, his generous offer to adopt was all that they required
“When would be convenient for him to call down to the pound?"
“Look I haven’t got a trailer could the Council bring it 'round?”

The lady remained calm but he could tell her voice was strained
As she promised she would ring the pound and see it was arranged
'Next day a Council ute pulled up, the Ranger wasn’t pleased
"I know this goat is yours," he said as he passed across the lead

Ignoring Bernie’s outstretched hand he sped off down the street
As the goat looked up all Bernie heard was a thin five-dollar bleat
“I saved your life again," said Bernie, as he dragged the goat away 
And doubled up on pegs and chains to ensure it didn’t stray.

Bernie Threadgold 1916 - 1991
A Fireman, Boxer, Weightlifter, Footballer, Lacrosse player, WW11 Soldier, Union Organiser, Labour Party stalwart, Sports Administrator and lots more.  He never took a backward step.  Happy Fathers day Dad.

MT 2022

Cairns Region

We left the Northern Territory 4 weeks ago and after a night in Cloncurry and another in Georgetown, we threaded our way through the beautiful Atherton Tablelands and arrived in Cairns – to a sunny 28 degrees.

Georgetown was a surprise. A small town (348 people) in far north outback Qld with a gold mining history. We had a cabin in the Caravan Park for the night. The park was full of metal detectorists. Evidently, they arrive every dry season and spend 6 to 8 weeks doing their thing in the area. Some of the Station owners charge them a small fee to dawdle around with their detectors. One old bloke I was talking to has been visiting every year for 20 odd years and “done well at the gold finding lark”. The town itself had terrific services for 350 people, including the local swimming pool. You can use the pool at any time day or night. Entry is via a token you purchase from the local Council and you put that in the slot and in you go for your swim. How simple is that? It also had indoor tennis courts; a basketball court etc and very clean and modern change rooms (open to the public). “I could live here” I said to Margret as I brushed another fly away …… no response! Maybe she didn’t hear me.

Since 2016 we have been avoiding the Adelaide winter and generally, this has been in Far North Queensland. After settling into our apartment in Cairns we spent our time visiting our clubs. We are members of about a dozen clubs in and around Cairns. Some cost a mere $5 for a Senior to be a member for 3 years. Membership attracts amazing benefits for meal and drink discounts, with points for every purchase. It peeves me every time I come up here and see communities benefiting from pokies, with local Clubs providing jobs for young people and pouring profits back into the community. How did we get it so wrong in South Australia? Pubs up here have pokies but they must be limited in numbers compared to the big Rugby, AFL, RSL, Surf Clubs etc.

We did very little sightseeing this year as we have seen all the waterfalls, hippy markets, train rides, sky lifts, etc in previous years. So what did we do?

Ate out frequently
Joined the Library (great services for printing, relaxing with the Weekend Australian etc)
Caught up with friends also visiting from Adelaide. On one occasion at Dundee’s a great restaurant with the Aquarium as a feature wall. The other occasion was at the Palm Cove Surf Club with a fellow Port Supporter to watch the Collingwood game (‘nuff said)
Did one market at the Botanic Gardens and stumbled upon a multicultural festival
Found a couple of Breweries

Discovered the local public swimming pools to maintain my laps (great facilities up here and $4 for Seniors). Resort pools are too small for laps and guests become upset when I bump into them!
Discovered 5 venues in and around Cairns that have Guinness on tap

After 2 weeks in Cairns, we moved to an apartment in a resort in Yorkys Knob. It is one of the terrific beach communities north of Cairns. Evidently, it is named after a Yorkshireman who settled there in the 1800s and blew his arm off dynamite fishing. He called the geographical feature a “nab” after a similar feature in his old Yorkshire village. Nab became Knob and there you go.

The next 2 weeks were spent doing more eating, drinking and swimming although it was interrupted for a day trip out to Fitzroy Island. It is about a 1 hour trip from the Cairns Marina and offers the usual snorkeling, glass bottom boat trip and scenic walks. We did the walk to Nudey Beach (not a nude in sight) and the glass bottom boat. The water was pristine but the beaches were covered in broken coral – painful to walk on without thongs. It was a good trip – but I won’t be lining up to do it again.

The lagoon area in Cairn is a real feature and this year we noticed they have added a Ferris Wheel to the precinct. We enjoyed a 20-minute ride admiring the surroundings and it got me thinking about Ferris Wheels as they seem to be popping up as Tourist attractions in Cities all over the world. Did you know George Washington Gale Ferris; a Pittsburgh bridge builder invented and unveiled the first Ferris Wheel at the World’s Columbian Expo held in Chicago in 1893? Wouldn’t George be amazed at his contribution to modern-day Tourism? The older I get the more people like George make me feel I have underachieved! Anyway, it prompted my limerick for this post

The Beauty Queen Bambi Deville

Loved riding the Cairns Ferris Wheel

It was windy the day

That her top blew away

And in Brisbane they heard Bambi Squeal

MT 2022

DARWIN AND NT TRAVELS

Darwin has certainly changed since I was last there about 10 years ago. The population has increased by about 50,000 people (now 160,000) and development around the City (particularly the Foreshore) is booming.

We moved across from Wagait Beach to Darwin the week they were having a rowdy public holiday. Territory Day marks the day when the Northern Territory shook off Commonwealth control and achieved self-government on 1^st July 1978. They certainly haven’t used their independence to become a “Nanny State” and a few examples I noticed include:

Anyone over 18 can purchase and explode fireworks on Territory Day. I was amazed at the skyrockets, crackers and other stuff being set off by random groups all over the City
On 4 of the main NT Highways, you need to do over 130 kph before you are speeding. Until 2007 there was no speed limit on those highways.
.No need to wear a bike helmet in the NT if you are over 17yo and the fine for Under 17yo is only $25 ($200 in SA)

I’m sure there are other examples and why I don’t necessarily agree with the freedom of choice in all instances, I do like the general idea of less Government control in some areas.

We spent the first 2 weeks at Yakka Downs Rural Retreat, a fully self-contained apartment with a great pool. It backed onto a hunting reserve and so we felt like we were in the bush but it was only a 30-minute drive to the CBD.

Our host was very keen on hunting and had 3 mean-looking dogs, a couple of old bush bashing vehicles, and a quad bike I heard him go out the first night and asked the next morning if he got anything. “Six pigs” he informed me and I responded that I hadn’t heard any shots fired. He explained that he didn’t use a gun as the dogs chase down the pigs and then he uses a knife to do the business. I acted all macho hoping he wouldn’t invite me out hunting and fortunately he didn’t. This same bloke has a pet croc in a glass tank. It was a bit over half a metre long and he would jump in the pool with it and swim around. Great people and a great Air Bnb.

I generally google “what’s on” when we arrive in a new place and on the second weekend, apart from the Territory Day concert and fireworks, Government House held an open day and the Darwin Symphony Orchestra was playing in the Botanical Gardens, Government House was the first ‘grand’ public building constructed in Darwin after white settlement in 1869 and it is a beautiful example of a colonial building and well worth the visit if you have the opportunity. The Darwin Symphony Orchestra “All out 80’s” concert was a great night and around 10,000 people rocked along. Amazingly all 80 members of the Darwin Symphony Orchestra are volunteers but they sounded very professional to my tin ear.

We did all the usual Tourist things like the Mindil and Parap markets and eating out at the foreshore restaurants, Shenanigans Bar (again) and the iconic Darwin Sailing Club where I caught up with my good mate Trevor from Adelaide. He rode all the way to Darwin on his Harley to join about 400 Harley Club enthusiasts from around Australia for a weekend rally. Not something I would want to do and I’m not sure Trevor would repeat the experience as he pointed out there isn’t much to see along the track. Good to catch up with Trevor for a couple of beers.

Our last Saturday in Darwin coincided with the first week of the Darwin Cup Carnival. Margret agreed to accompany me providing we took the hospitality option in the new Ted Baily Grandstand. We shared a table with a local couple and it was a good fun day – and I lost as usual.

After 10 days at the Air BnB and a short stay for a few days in Darwin City, we set off for Katherine calling in for dips at Berry Hot Springs and Mataranka. Lots of history at Berry Hot Springs as it was part of a rest and recreation camp set up by the armed forces for the 100,000 personnel based in the area during the Second World War. We had 3 nights at a cabin in Katherine where we took a cruise through the 2 longest Gorges. Aboriginal Culture associated with the Gorges is the main attraction at Katherine and we did manage to see a few crocs on our cruise. Three nights in Katherine was plenty of time to take in all the sites (all overcrowded with tourists) before we moved on to Daly Waters

Why are we staying at a pub in the middle of nowhere? I asked my partner and tour guide. Daly Waters is a Mecca for caravan people and the pub is great fun. The bar and beer gardem areas are packed from about 3pm on and live music adds to an outback laid back feel where women must get fairly loose as there are hundreds of bras hanging from the rafters. The meal was good, the Guinness cans a very reasonable $7.70 each and the accommodation was very modern. That stuff about relaxed protocols in the Territory certainly applies here as the owner (riding his gopher) brings a horse through the bar and eating area about halfway through the evening. I also met the head gardener and he wanders the streets uninhibited keeping the weeds down. It was a good night and well worth dropping in.

We had one other stop in the Territory on our drive to Cld. That was on the Barkly Highway at Barkly Station. We had a cabin and the park was jam-packed with about 80 vans for us to pass the next day! This year vans way outnumber cars on the highways up here but our little Kia Chester had no problems leaving them in our dust, along with the 50-metre road trains, as we ripped along at 130kph plus.

I loved our day at the races and as some of you may know we have had a share in a couple of nags over years. Margret didn’t seem keen when I floated the idea of maybe giving it another go – so my limerick this time is ….

I ordered a racehorse online

A thoroughbred sold in it’s prime.

Now just for a laugh

They sent a giraffe

But it wins by a neck every time.

Heading North for Winter – June 2022

Once again we have left the Adelaide winter behind us and headed for the tropics. After a 3150km drive in “Chester”, Margret’s Kia Sportage, we arrived at Wagait Beach at the top of the Cox Peninsula and across the Beagle Gulf from Darwin.

Beautiful Wagait Beach 33 degrees — **Wagait Beach**

It was a fairly uneventful drive with overnights in the usual towns however; we did discover a couple of interesting new places. Wycliffe Well located just after the Devils Marbles and about 12 hours south of Darwin has been “identified” as “Australia’s (and possibly the World’s) best location if you wish to see a UFO. It should be more famous than Roswell” according to an article in the NT News (so it must be true!). Personally, I’d never heard of the place until we pulled in for fuel. They certainly have the theme going with little green men everywhere. We also spent most of the day and a night at Mataranka. Again a new stop for us and the Mataranka hot springs (Bitter springs) was an experience I couldn’t resist. Dipping in beautiful clear water at constant 34 degrees was definitely appreciated by my tired old bones.

Our shack at Wagait Beach pop 500 was off the grid, basic but with plenty of room and a good shower and comfy bed. We spent most of our time on the big wide verandah when home. The beaches here are beautiful but the warning signs pretty much preclude swimming every month of the year. The walks along the beaches reveal old WW11 gun emplacement relics and a short way from town we visited a site where a B24 United States bomber crashed and 6 US aircrew lost their lives. We tend to forget the US has a large presence in Northern Australia during the war and just how close the Japanese came to landing in the Northern Territory The two raids on Darwin in Feb 1942 killed more than 240 civilians and Australian and US service personnel with a further 300 to 400 wounded. I had never really considered US service personnel being killed while posted in Australia until I explored a bit of history here in Wagait beach.

We were only 15km from Darwin via a regular walk-on Sealink ferry service but it is a 90-minute drive if you go around the gulf. The Ferry leaves from the Mandorah Jetty (about 5kms from Wagait beach) and it offers a great ride and value (gotta love those Senior rates). We travelled across for a day and tripped around on the free buses (Seniors again). Margret did some shopping and I happened to stumble across Shenanigans, a fine establishment offering Guinness at $7 a pint in the 4pm to 7pm happy hour.

After spending a week walking every beach several times and exploring all the “highlights” at Wagait beach we decided we were bored (we even did the fitness circuit around the oval one morning.) We are moving closer to Darwin in a few days so rather than taking the Ferry back there we found a place where we could do lunch about an hour west of our accommodation. Crab Claw Island Resort is stuck in the middle of nowhere down a 15km dirt track off Highway 1 (1800km to Broome!). We spent a few hours there and had a great lunch. The accommodation was impressive and the van park was full but unless you want to go on a fishing Charter or take a scenic helicopter flight it isn’t somewhere I would want to spend a week.

The Cox Country Club – HOME of the MUFF is the only boozer for Wagait beach and nearby Mandorah. It is a community-run club, very quirky, and attracts many day visitors from Darwin – Sealink even runs dedicated weekend one-day ferry packages to the Club. Good meals and good people but where does the MUFF come from I hear you ask (Mandorah Ukulele Folk Festival! -not what I thought either)

Wagait Beach and Mandorah is a great little community but 10 days was probably a bit long. We met some eccentric characters and we were told not to bother locking our doors as there is no police station or crime in the area. They will proudly tell you that the last crime they had in the community was at Mandorah in 2001 when a man was found guilty of murdering and eating his victim. True story and well worth googling “Mandorah Cannibal NT News” if you want an interesting read. Of course, the older locals all knew him and his victim and are happy to tell you all about it. I haven’t seen this in any of the articles but one bloke told me that after eating him the cannibal stole his push bike and rode to Mt Isa where he was arrested (1600 kms hmmm?)

So why is Margret’s Kia Sportage called Chester? Well, some good friends gave us a ride to collect her new car from the dealership a couple of years ago and we had agreed to have lunch nearby after things were finalised. Over lunch the friends told us they wandered around the furniture store next door to the car dealership and on impulse bought a Chesterfield lounge – hence Chester was born.

A flash young Ford salesman, Sylvester

Tried selling my wife a Fiesta

“My husband’s quite tall”

She told the young fool

But I fit in her KIA named Chester

Yes, that’s right – Tall …..Next stop Darwin

The Bellarine Peninsula

We finally managed to use a 12-month-old “Travel Auction” to Portarlington on the Bellarine Peninsula, South West of Melbourne, below Geelong, and not far from our daughter Louise who lives in Torquay.

We like to dawdle when we travel nowadays so day one was a 5-hour drive to Hamilton Vic and an Air BnB Farm stay. Lots of horses etc. but it was windy to the point that we hardly ventured out of our little “Grape Fruit Cottage” accommodation. The wind didn’t surprise me as, until his death in 2015, the former PM Malcolm Fraser lived on a nearby property – no wonder I couldn’t find my trousers the next morning! A quick look around Hamilton Town Centre after breakfast then a backroads trip through small Vic country towns (lunch at a little town called Harrow) to our accommodation at Port Arlington, a fishing village that has evolved as a major centre for Mussel farming in Port Phillip Bay. Louise joined us on Saturday and we had an excellent feed of Mussels at Pier Street on the foreshore. Port Arlington also hosts the Ferry Terminal between the Bellarine Peninsula and Melbourne. “The Geelong Flyer” steams across Port Phillip Bay and delivers passengers to Docklands. I was told special ferries full of Cat Supporters regularly depart on “away match days” – but who cares about football? – Not me!

Pier Strret, The Geeelong Flyer and magnificient mussels — Pier Strret Restaurant

Day 3 (Saturday) was basically a tourist day. We dropped into the Visitor Information Centre in Torquay and armed with way too much information; we drove around the Bellarine Peninsula on Saturday and Sunday looking at some of the highlights. The town of Queenscliff is a grand old town with grand old buildings and loads of history, another ferry terminal, and a holiday destination for the rich and famous from Melbourne.

Sunday we did the 2-hour tour of Queenscliff Fort. Established in 1860 to defend the entrance to Port Phillip Bay, it was a fully functional defence force facility until 1946 and still houses civilian defence force personnel today. Lots of history with an interesting story about the fort firing the first artillery shot anywhere in the world, at the outbreak of WW2. It was fired across the bow of a German freighter attempting to leave Port Phillip Bay hours after war was declared in Europe. Worth a google if interested.

Queenscliff is also the home of the heritage Bellarine Railway offering a range of steam train rides between Queenscliff and Drysdale. The most famous is the Blues Train, a night of Blues music, dining, and drinking. Heaven on rails … and definitely the highlight of our trip.

We had tickets for Saturday night, the first gig since March 2020, and the operator Hugo T Armstrong greeted 200 of us at the station and told us of the ‘hell’ he and others in the music industry have been through since covid hit. He was genuinely beside himself with joy not only for his business but also for the musos performing on the train for the first time in over 2 years.

The train was an ex-South African Class 24 locomotive pulling 4 carriages (A,B,C and D). The night started with buying a bucket of beer if you chose to (ice provided) and dinner on the train. After dinner, the train left the station and in our first carriage (B) the fabulous Luke Greenhatch began playing and entertaining us. He was right into the blues tempo singing repeatedly about how he was “Crazy ‘bout his baby”. Luke did mention that if you didn’t like songs about your baby, then blues probably wasn’t for you.

After about 30 minutes the train pulled in at Swan Bay platform for punters to replenish our drinks etc. and we moved along to carriage C hosted by Jimi Hocking and 2 friends. Jimi was with the Screaming Jets, Spectre 7, and the Angels. In 2005, Jimi won the International Blues Challenge in Memphis, Tennessee, and has lots more accolades. More from my era he sometimes plays with the boys from “Chain” and yes he had us all up singing and bopping to “I remember when I was Young”. What a pro – and after 30 minutes we pulled in back at Queenscliff for Margret to line up for a cup of tea and dessert while Lou and I replenished our beer stocks before we climbed back aboard carriage D for the next leg to be entertained by “The Detonators”. They are a Melbourne based 4 piece blues band formed in 1997. Again great stuff and before we knew it another 30 minutes had gone and we were back at Swan bay, and changing carriages for the last time.

Our last Carriage (A) featured George Kamikawa billed as the Japanese Blues Cowboy. He has played at various venues and festivals throughout Australia, has won major Busking Championships – and what an entertainer. He had the carriage singing and dancing to some classic blues tunes and an original by him in Japanese that featured the words “Sake, sake sake” over and over (almost as repetitive as Luke’s Crazy for my Baby). – the fact that we were all fairly lubricated by that time of night probably didn’t hurt the performance but again a real pro and a great way to end a fantastic night.

George the Blues Cowboy – Maate love you Maate …

Needless to say, Margret drove us back to our accommodation and it was off to bed. After another night in Portarlington, we dawdled home spending a day in Horsham (great Botanic Park) and staying the night there before proceeding to Border Town (and a precautionary PCR test as we noticed there weren’t any other cars at the tent) before arriving back in Adelaide.

I loved the Blues Train (thanks again Lou for organising the tickets). The lyrics of blues songs impress me almost as much as the music and rather than tax my brain for a limerick, I will share an extract of the lyrics of a Blues song you can find on Youtube.

Big Legged Woman – Freddie King

I love the tip, I love the top, I love you better than a hog loves slop
‘Cause you’re a big legged woman, with a short short miniskirt
Promise me darlin’, you’ll never make me feel like dirt”

Pure poetry and even better with music ….

THE SLOW TRIP HOME

For the past 3 months we have been fortunate, keeping away from the dreaded COVID lockdowns so with things hotting up in NSW we decided it was probably time to slowly head for the NT border. The plan was to spend a couple of weeks visiting some outback places we haven’t visited in the past.

We left Airlie Beach, travelled west, and spent 4 nights in Emerald. We were impressed with the tidiness of the place and it seems to be thriving with the support of the local coal Industry. The town (about 12,000 pop) has everything including a claim to the largest painting in the world – on an Easel (Giant VanGogh Sunflowers). I found a good Irish Pub and things only improved when I discovered we were going to be there for the Emerald races. We drove out to the Gem Fields (about 50 kms west) and the highlight was Muggachinos Strudel Hut in Rubyvale. Great strudel and the bloke who brought the coffee returned about a minute later with 2 complimentary shot glasses of Port. A bit strange at 10am on a Tuesday morning but down the hatch….

**Biggest paining in the World on an Easel and Emeral Races Mounting Yard**

Next stop was 4 nights in Longreach and along the way, we stopped at the Tree of Knowledge in Barcaldine. Labour Party stalwarts would know that the tree is famous for being the birthplace of the Australian Labour movement and celebrates the leaders of the 1891 Shearers Strike. This gave birth to the Australian Workers Union and the Australian Labour Party – so much I could add but best left unsaid.

**Tree of Knowledge Barcaldine and Australian Stockman’s Hall of Fame**

Longreach caters for tourists. The Australian Stockman’s Hall of Fame is very impressive and we spent half a day there looking at the exhibits and watching the live show (lots of action). Across the road is the QANTAS Founders Museum tracing the progress of the flying kangaroo from its outback roots to the international airline of today. The museum was full of impressive planes (including an actual 747) and various interactive displays. We returned at night for the 30 minutes Luminescent Light Show where they project images onto the 747 accompanied by big sound effects.

**Inside the Stockman’s Hall and part of the live show**

**The 747 they project images onto during the Luminescent Light and Sound Show (best part of the museum experience)**

My favourite attraction in Longreach was a Sunset cruise on the Thomson River followed by a table service camp oven themed outdoor dinner with a 2-hour stage show. Great food, good service, and the entertainer was much better than I expected.

**Thomson River Sunset from boat and the setting for the dinner and show**

We heard about a race meeting and festival in Cloncurry on the weekend so it became a detour and a must-stop on our slow trip home. Friday night included free curry from 6 different stalls and then you went to a table and lodged voting tickets on which curries you thought best. This was followed by a Mine Cart Rally where about 6 teams competed around a set course pushing mine carts while stopping to undertake set tasks (eg hammering spikes into a railway sleeper). Lots of other action (program below).

**The Festival Program and Mine Cart Racing**

The next day we attended the Cloncurry Races. They go all out with fashions of the field, full race card, bookies, and lots of food. I felt well out of place in my shorts and sandals as most of the blokes we dressed up with their best cowboy hats but the ladies stole the show in outfits that wouldn’t have looked out of place at Royal Randwick. It was a good day but we lost again … and then back to our accommodation to watch the Port boys – and lost again. I was stunned but they can’t blame me I was in Cloncurry!

**Cloncurry Races and Boulia Min Min Experience**

From Cloncurry we headed down to Boulia as I had mapped out a shortcut from there to Alice Springs. We did visit the Min Min Encounter Visitor Centre in Boulia where they put on a very good show about mysterious lights that have been reported in the area for many years. It was surprisingly high-standard stuff for a small outback town with 301 people and where camels were wandering around the place.

**Start of the Plenty Highway – it got worse ! and what you have to pay for diesel at outback stations**

So we headed down my shortcut which was 834kms of mainly dirt road. The road to the Qld NT border is reasonable but then it becomes rough with corrugations and some heavy areas of bulldust. There is no phone reception and we didn’t spy a single vehicle travelling in our direction. There is a phone if you go into Tobermory station 200kms down the track or Jervois Station 500kms down the road. I started getting nervous when I kept seeing blown tyres laying on the side of the road every few kms and then it happened. “That feels like a bit more than corrugations I thought” – and sure enough I had a shredded tyre and only one spare. I changed the tyre and took things very slowly as we were still 150kms to Jervois station. When we arrived, all the men were out working but one of the wives thought they may have an old tyre that would fit the Triton. They had some Shearers Quarters accommodation so we stayed there the night and I was delighted when I heard the air compressor going at 6am next morning and sure enough, the blokes had fitted an old tyre to my spare. It was still a very cautious trip down to Alice Springs where the Tyrepower owner told me they never go on that road if they can avoid it and they definitely don’t go on there with only one spare tyre.

**A night in the shearers quarters at Jervois station and one tyre down and fingers crossed**

Well they fixed us up so we stayed 2 nights in Alice Springs, went on to Coober Pedy for a night, Port Augusta another night, and after a terrific 3 months, 15,000km road trip we arrived home.

Met an outback tyre expert named Fred,

Took a glance at my wheel and then said,

“Right at this juncture

I’d say it’s a puncture”

He could tell by the rubber it shed !

MT 2021

I won’t be tackling long outback roads again without a backup travelling companion vehicle and certainly not without 2 spares.

The Gulf to Magnetic Island and the Whitsundays

We left the Gulf of Carpentaria and our first stop south was the Bourke and Wills Roadhouse in the middle of nowhere. I thought it wise to top up on diesel, went in to pay and they asked me to go back to the bowser and take a photo with my phone so they knew how much to charge me. That’s what I call keeping it simple!

Our next stop was Cloncurry and the Currymerrymuster was on all weekend. That night we went to the oval for the bull riding. I reckon both the riders and the clowns who distract the bulls after the rider falls, have a limited working life. The Announcer at the Bull Riding event kept calling for 2 local lads and two local ladies (yes ladies) to take on boxers in Fred Brophy’s Boxing Troupe.

I couldn’t believe this sideshow was still going. The last time I saw it was at the Smelter’s Picnic 50 years ago. The fights didn’t start until after the bull riding (10pm) we didn’t hang around. Looking at the crowd and the rate the bundys were being knocked back, I reckon there would have been plenty of volunteers.

Winton was next stop and it was all about dinosaurs. A mate suggested we drop into the Kyuna Blue Heeler Hotel (a pub in the middle of nowhere) and what did we find but a surf boat hanging from the roof. Evidently, the fact that it is 600kms from the nearest beach isn’t a problem and clubs descend on Kyuna each year as a fundraiser for the RFDS. Another fundraiser involves a gold coin donation to leave a message on the pub wall (inside and outside is covered in messages). I may reveal my message in a few weeks time!

We were 5 nights in Winton. This is dinosaur central with the Age of the Dinosaurs Museum of Natural History (located about 15kms out of town) and The Dinosaur Stampede National Monument at Lark Quarry, 110 km of mainly dirt road from Winton. Evidently, these displays are world-famous. The people involved are clearly passionate with one volunteer (below) working for the past month on revealing the single footprint fossil in the stone. Good on him but having been there my view is that if you have seen one dinosaur footprint you have probably seen them all.

Winton is also home to the Waltzaing Matilda Centre (a shrine to Banjo Paterson), Qantas park (started here) and I managed to find Guinness on tap at the local pub (selfie attempt below)

The next stop was Charters Towers for two nights. Great parks and gardens and beautiful historic buildings. Over 200 tons of gold was taken from nearby goldfields in the late 1800’s and it was clearly a rich community in its glory days. It even had its own Stock Exchange. Around 200 cricket teams descend on the town each year for the Gold Field Ashes but apart from this it seems to be all about cattle nowadays.

We have visited Magnetic Island once before but this time we took the car across on the ferry and stayed for 10 nights at a resort. It is probably one of the most beautiful places we have visited and if you love a great climate, great beaches, and a relaxed lifestyle only 40 minutes by ferry from Townsville, this is the place for you. We agree that we could easily live there if we ever moved from Largs Bay.

After Magnetic Island, we booked into a resort at Airlie Beach, again for 10 nights. This is another beautiful spot on the Whitsundays and it is all about sailing. Several Marinas and hundreds of yachts are spread around the town including some very impressive superyachts (eg for hire starting at US$100,000pw). We have stayed here before and travelled out to the reef via Whitehaven beach on one of the boats but Margret gets seasick so this time we took a one-hour flight. It took us further out, over Whitehaven Beach, Heart Reef, Hardy Reef, and back over Hamilton Island. The Marina Shores resort was fantastic but you know you are getting old when you hear a yell from the ensuite and rush in to find your wife in the shower, thrusting little bottles at you and asking “which one is the shampoo?”

I think I have had two limerick contributions since I started this diary so to encourage contributions, I have attempted a limerick about how to write a limerick…

As an art form the limerick’s sublime

Lines one, two, and five should rhyme,

and line 3 with line 4

There’s really no more

All you need to write limericks is time.